Can't let go

I can see you there, looking at me, wondering what's going on. I know you love me. I know I love you. But is love really enough? Isn’t that the million-dollar question?
When I first met you, the days passed by and my love for you intensified. Days passed by and I saw the love in your eyes deepen. And then years passed by, and the swelling in my heart wore off. And the love became a routine. Saying I love you became habitual.
There are no more “moments”. There are no more surprises. But what are you going to do? Sometimes you sit and question if it’s real. Or was it just a set of circumstances that brought you together, and one way or another enforced in you the need to stay together? Because nobody is perfect. You go through people looking for the imperfections that are part of what makes them perfect, till you find the person you feel has tolerable imperfections. And people have different tastes. A person whose flaws are perfect to me may not be what you think is perfect.
And then you allow yourself to fall. And sometimes it’s just a little. And sometimes fall so deeply in love it consumes you. But then years pass by, and you forget to work on it. And everything is a pattern. A design molded on the wall of your life. And even though it needs fresh paint, you delay. And some people are weak: you take it for fear of being abandoned or alone.
Sometimes I am exactly the way you want me, and sometimes I become too much of my real self and I see the wonder in your eyes. I love you, and I’m doing my best. But all I can do is try. This is all that is contained within me, and what we have, even if it isn’t perfect, it’s real.